30 July, 2009

Marinated Thanksgiving Turkey

Marinated Thanksgiving Turkey
Also works for Rock / Game (hen) or Chicken

• 1 ½ Cup Chicken broth
• 1 Cup Soy sauce
• 2 Cups Water
• 2/3 Cup Lemon Juice
• 1 ½ teaspoon Ground Ginger
• 2 cloves garlic (minced)
• 1 teaspoon pepper

14-18 pound Turkey
Those turkey sized oven bags work great for this (in the same isle as chicken sized one)

Clear a space in the ‘fridge

Combine all ingredients (duh!), warm in a sauce pan.

Pour Marinade in a big plastic bag after you put the bird in (Probably ought to double bag it… Trust me on this.)

Use a bunch of twist-ties and close the bag up tight (Again, duh!) and put it in the fridge (Yeah… Duh!!)

Every once-in-a-while: reach in the ‘fridge and flip the bag over. Do this for AT LEAST 24 hours, better if you can soak the bird for a couple days.

Keep about 2 cups of the marinade… Take the bird out of the bag and cook it:

Basting frequently. Bake at 325º F for about 4 hours (or more) until you get 185º on a meat thermometer.

When the bird begins to brown, to block the alien frequencies cover lightly with a tent of aluminum foil.

Foil hats for the rest of your paranoid family is optional. Sort of…?

For smaller birds: Try this “Drunken Chicken” variation on a marinated bird.

Half-fill a greased small (6 oz. {V-8 or apricot nectar}) can with some cheap (cheep) beer, and stick it up the hens’ ass so it has something to sit on while you cook it.

Same goes for a chicken, though, use a bigger (12 oz.) can because chickens have a much larger asshole.

Turkey assholes are WAY to big… Don’t even think about it!

Recipe submitted anonymously by Richie.

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